If there is great conflict and/or power imbalances between you and your spouse, keeping your divorce affordable will be a challenge. The most affordable divorce processes, mediation and “kitchen table” divorces are not for you. It also may mean that collaborative divorce is not an option. But it still may be possible to keep costs within reason.
You may be tempted to look for the meanest, most aggressive courtroom lawyer (litigator) you can find. But, if affordability is an issue, do you want someone who will add exponentially to the “billable hours” you will have to pay for?
It may be counter-intuitive, but consider hiring an experienced litigator who also has considerable training and experience in mediation and collaborative divorce. Why? Because such a litigator has more skills in his/her negotiating toolbox, than the old school divorce “bomber.” Old school divorce negotiation tactics usually exacerbate conflict, leading to months of court-generated paper work. Moreover, in divorce court in Westchester County, NY, the judges now require trial notebooks that take many billable hours for attorneys to prepare.
Your hybrid litigator-collaborative attorney will fight for you, if necessary. However, being skilled in mediation and collaborative negotiation, he/she can find ways to sidestep the protracted court process. This can mean considerable cost savings.
As advised in our prior blog posts, the hourly rate of your attorney does not have to be $600 per hour or more. There are very competent, experienced divorce lawyers who charge $350 to $400 per hour. By using more affordable professionals, you and your spouse can save substantial sums of money.
Before meetings with your attorney, organize your thoughts by preparing some notes in advance. Be direct and concise with your questions and subjects that you want to discuss. Consider preparing a written agenda for such meetings. Also, when meeting with your lawyer, try to stay away from emotional issues. You can more affordably get such help from a good mental health professional such as a clinical social worker or psychologist who have been trained to deal with such issues. Moreover, their hourly rates are substantially lower than attorneys’ rates.
One more important piece of advice: If you want a second opinion, do yourself a favor. Pay for a consultation with another divorce lawyer. Don’t get opinions from non-attorney friends. People who are not divorce experts, will cause confusion and “agita” for you.
© Arnold D. Cribari 2016
